Sunday, April 4, 2010


What a dull night, spending most of the time alone in the dark room accompanied by a small bright of light, facing my laptop and the time passes by..It was cold and sore night, no one is in the house. A peace and quiet moment as wanted. I stood up and walked to the kitchen making a cup of coffee to make me stay up for the night. Undesirable, unwanted WAR is coming up, preparing weaponary, collecting intelligence and knowledge, memorizing details of certainty. It's between me and you now. All i wanted was to end your life and make sure you'll never see my face again. I will deliberately pointed out my gun blowing you up in your head. I will laugh and satisfied watching yourself till the very last moment of death.

What an imagination do i have, comparing war on my disreputable, arrogant bastad boss demanding me to finish the 2 years work on a single day. Having my own imaginary friends couldn't help me with my will to overcome the problems. I look myself like a small atom particle in a small amount of liquid, where it leaked from drinking can in the solitary, spacious and ample desert. What an enormous wide world to explore. A blink of an eye that could change the world peace to the most deadly town. Zombies taking over making a complete colonial domination having a throne on their own. Articulate imaginary keep buzzing in my head. What should i do? The world doesn't end yet but it will be. My heart keep saying otherwise. The heart beating weakly and the lungs working disorderly. Having two packs of ciggarettes a day. My breath became short and i can't hardly blew a balloon. I'm weak, weak enough to be beaten by a 6 year old kid. My life screwed when I lost my wife because of infection in her lungs. My daughter died from an accident with a drunk driver while she was playing with her doll just outside the yard. I cried but i didn't felt my tears warmingly flowing down through my cheeks. A sore cold and freezing snow crystalize my tears. And now I'm waiting for my death to come.

How sad..

How sad it is when I read this tearful blog from an anguish person as I say.

Well I hoped that life would never happen to me.


Sunday, September 6, 2009

ipoh mali....


Dum dee dum dum

What a lovely Saturday it was yesterday but what makes it mundane was the coq class at 10am. I woke up early and went Akmal's room to ask him to go around Ipoh for some shopping. Oh well, my scholar had been given and it's my time of revenge since been a year, NO shopping.

"Hey Akmal, let's go to Ipoh"
with morning face, "Yeah, sure sure", Akmal said,
"But i got a coq to attend, better move in the evening? I'll buy u break fasting in Old Town.", I smiled.
"Yeah, you better be sure about that. Now go to coq", he continued sleeping.

Wow, I really am going to Ipoh for shopping. I just can't wait the boring lecture of ENTREPRENEURSHIP I finished. At the middle of the lecture, I went to Block O to 'steal' newspaper and there i got New Straits times and The Star. Both headlines was about the MCA president who were accused of corruption in the Port Klang Free Zone project (PKFZ). The police also had freeze the Kuala Dimensi assets which hold the RM140M accounts crucial to probe into PKFZ scandal. Did i read a lot about politicians? Nah, never really interested in politics which made me sick. I just turned the paper from front to the back and to the delight news of sports which entertains me more. 'World Cup Qualifiers'.

My watch shows that it's already 12pm. Then I went back to Akmal's room and asked,

"Are we really going this evening?",
"Oh cannot la, i got some business till night", explaining.

Pfft, I knew it. I don't bother about that. He never misses meeting his girlfriend for a date. Oh damn! I want to go shopping! I need to buy some new pants and shirts, basketball shoes and many more but I don't have transport. And I walked in front of Amar's room and yelled, "Amar, let's go to Ipoh! Akmal cancelled." Disturbance to the hallway of my house made Amar can't focus to his Nur Kasih telemovie. Hahaha :P

And off we were to Ipoh. (Amar, me, Borhan and Tengku Aiman.)

First destination: Ipoh Parade

There I bought my first basketball shoe from the Adidas store on the ground floor. Without hesitation, I just asked for UK size 9 for the first shoe I saw. Comfortable with it and bought it for RM199.90. Next, walking and walking and then I saw a glass kiosk. And there I bought a RM33 spectacles just to make a new appearance in class hehe. Not enough with the same floor, I continued to the next. And there I saw the F.O.S store, where I bought my new belt. The old ones already torn up. New belt, RM 24.60. Next is the highest floor, the Heaven of Clothes. There I bought some clothes ended losing my money for RM83.

Total money spent: RM340.50

Second destination: Electric store

We were searching for non-induction hot plate. It was far away from easy to find in any store now eventhough it only cost below than RM100. Because of it's old school product so, there should be only few in Malaysia. That's what we thought.

Total money spent: RM0

Third destination
: Jusco

And there I saw a SALE in SODA. I went in and saw a black SODA jeans. Interested with it and bought it for RM59.50. That totals up RM400 just only for me and the other of my friends? RM15++ hahaha.. I sure need to buy new wallet, my money is flowing like water. Hahaha. Then Amar bought us one variety bucket from KFC for break fasting
. As we were walking in the Jusco we found the local KHIND brand of hot plate. We were very happy, at last we found it.

And off we head back to UTP

Bye..bye Ipoh.....

Friday, September 4, 2009

pursuit excellence

Come on nizam!! It's a tests week, don't sit there and just watching the laptop screen without a blink of an eye..Come on brain cells, work and work more. Maybe the electricity just don't get pumped to flow in my nerve cells to move my muscle and brain to act and think. Accusation on a non-moralized ethic of studying just can't boost up my intention to focus to my books. Thought to have insufficient interest on the current subject learning might invade half of my brain to rest and sleep more. Well, I might have to start something new. New to me, new to everyone, and new to the whole wide world. How about one question of quizzes for each bite of food? That might pay me attention to study? Well it might be.

  • Open the book and lecture notes while the other hand shisha-ing? That's odd..
  • How about reading the article on soft phyllosilicate of unstable clay mineral (montmorillonite) while eating sushi? Wow, that's hmm, a bit over as i say?
  • Oh, oh can I drive while practising myself, well practically remembering the equation on open flow channel of hydraulics? I might hit the red light on that one...

Tomorrow will be a Geotechnical Engineering test that covers

  • Soil in engineering
  • Origin formation of soil
  • Soil grading classification
  • Soil index properties (coarse-grained soil)
  • Soil index properties (fine-grained soil)
  • Weight volume relationship
but do i need to cover all this? by reading the pathetic fully alphabetic-wording slide of notes?
nah, will NOT though..I'll just stick it up with straight 3 semester, either alphabetic or numerical, twins and absolutely the same test question used all over again. This semester might be the same question again.. hehe. Thank god, bless me..

Off to study now :)

peace brother

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

i wonder why..

what does it mean to me??

I wonder why..why is it this sport that i chose for me to focus on? Well, I'll tell you more. I started play basketball since in secondary school, playing, training, dribbling, turning etc.. I started to join tournaments after a year which was I'm in form 2.. the biggest achievement was entering final game in PPM center zone and ended second place. I went through national level in year 2006..but I didn't focus only in basketball, that's why I suck at improving my skills.. I joined rugby and soccer a while. A big achievement in sports that i involved with a big different of style of playing. Could be harsh play of rugby as in playing basketball and as well as the other way round..but i pretty much in focusing in basketball now. Maybe i just need to keep myself away from getting shorter? I do differ in my height since I involved in rugby.. So, I guess that's just it. I'm on with basketball :P

euphoria in vain

Gloomy day as it is even when the clouds are white and the skies are blue. The mist of fear and shivering as a matter of the influence of examination coming near. What on earth am i still doing? while others struggles, reckoning the days of war. I'm still sitting on this cramped seat, commencing the will of boredom. Surfing the internet, facebook, the only that I'm watching at besides taking action of email alert. Day by day, the surroundings stifles my effort to study hard. I couldn't agree more the technology sure do bring along harm besides the advantage of living. Dwelling and lingering me over to the delusive world of hope.The whispers of success softly, challenging me to survive the obstacles.

  • Tired of being such a lazy ass, sleeping all the while, which i don't really meant to of course :P
  • Come and help me stand up to join the force to the upper life.
  • See whats in front and bring along the past as a supply of an outlandish wisdom of fortune.
  • Rebuild up the the collapsed wall of effort towards target.
  • List the wishlist of things that burgeoning flying colors.

But do realize, life is temporary
All out is the best word for you. You can do it nizam!!

Monday, August 31, 2009

Happy 52nd Independence Day

in just a blink of an eye, it's officially our 52nd Independence day..Appreciation to the elders who joined forces to gain independence for Malaysia. Proud to be Malaysian! Yeay!!

only it's awkward no such massive celebration, maybe just not yet... maybe everyone lack of energy during fasting..hmm patriotism should not be abandoned..

Sunday, August 30, 2009